Lessons for "The Day After" (and it's not the movie)...

I plucked the following from the deep recesses of my cobweb-filled vault of locked memories.  I hope that for my daring and dangerous heist, you guys out there can see some light at the end of the tunnel (and hopefully it's not of some on-coming express train)..

Let's say you've finally found that illusive someone who seems to fit rather well into your idea of the person you want to be with for the long-term.  You know, not just for a simple snuggle session or a fiesty scandal-filled stolen weekend.  It's someone you want to lose your name for (and other kind of losses you may well be pleased to undergo).  I mean, well.. you know what I mean.

Then.. wham-bam..kaboom.. a bombshell exploded right in your guts when that person rejects you.  So what do you do?

You have a two choices : (1) die right there and then; or (2) spit him in the face and be thankful you still have your name.

Or, perhaps you will do what I did, (as I would probably do again if I were to encounter a similar situation in future). 

No, I didn't gave life up and die.  But I did go through the motions of feeling what near-death is like.  It is an awful feeling, like you are about to defeacate but things seemed stuck in netherland.  Your mind constipates, your body shrivels (or bloats as the case may be), and you realise despite the bluriness around you, that you are in some stinky shithouse.

And at the end of it, you realise that it's the other person who leads you there in the first place.  But thats what you get when you feed voraciously on imaginary and illusive emotions : a bellyful of nothing (and perhaps just some loud breakwinds).

And neither did I spat on his face, because I thought it was rude to do so.  I can be mean, but never, ever rude.  It's like the difference between a whore and a slut : one does it strictly for money, the other, for a price.  If you can't figure that out, then probably the housewives in your neighbourhood aren't desparate enough.

What I did was a compromise : I went through the motions of dying for a fair bit (required to get your venoms in focus) and then I spat out whatever feelings I had in my heart through my head.  And then, like Ms Gaynor's song I Will Survive, I did. Yes I did..

I guess that episode was the actual reality check for me.  That was when I learned to put down my feet and said "NO" when my heart screamed "say YES you shithead".  

But after all these years, I come to know that we all need shithouses.  Without them, we'd never get rid of our poisons and toxins...